Happy Birthday, Bloggy

Today marks one year since I started blogging actively again here at Blogger. But can you believe I've actually been blogging now sporadically over the course of the last decade or more (wow, I feel old)? The very first blog I created was at Asian Avenue. I'm sure you've never heard of it, especially if you're not Asian.  I think that was back in 2000. I remember I was on it while I was at Penn State so it might have been as early as 1998. Then it was onto Xanga. Remember Xanga?? I loved Xanga because a lot of my friends were on there. But then Friendster and MySpace became popular so everyone left Xanga. And we all know what blew up after MySpace - the Eff-Book. So basically, if blogging were a child, mine would be a teenager!

Since Xanga, I bounced to Blogger, to Wordpress, and back to Blogger. I tried Tumblr too but didn't stick with it. Here's a link to my blog from 2008 to 2012: http://jurrious.wordpress.com/. I love reading about old times. It puts things into perspective. I find myself blogging consistently when I'm happy in my life. So if my posts start to become scarce, I'm either turning to the dark side or too busy (but if I'm busy I should eventually have a lot to write about).

For 2014, I think I might start doing my daily snapshots again. Sometimes it's hard to make the mundane into something blog worthy day in and day out, but oftentimes I surprise myself with these Pics of the Day or Daily Snapshots. It forces you to find the beauty in every day, even if it's just the plate of food in front of you or the weather outside. Days go by so fast and are so easily forgotten. Blogging helps me remember those days. And I also love reading other blogs and living vicariously through others.

Girl Crush

I have a major girl crush on Guiliana Rancic. I think her personality is amaze balls and her husband isn't too shabby either. I found out about her FabFitFun subscription box and I had to sign up because, well, I want presents from Guiliana.

Why am I crushing on her?  Hmm.. maybe it's because she's also a DMV (DC/MD/VA area) girl. She's a UMD and American University grad. I lived near College Park and Friendship Heights (one metro stop away from AU - Tenleytown, holla!) for a big chunk of my life so I have a special place in my heart for Murrland. And now also Guiliana. Plus she's great at what she does and she's been through some pretty serious stuff. Not to mention she is GORGE. See you tonight on #GandB!

via

July Sixteenth

Today would have been my mom's 64th birthday. She passed away in 2009 about three weeks after her 60th. The first couple years following her death, I found myself doing special things around the time of her birthday.

In 2010, Roy and I were in Malibu, CA for my BFF's wedding. Her anniversary is tomorrow:

So pretty

Liz & Steve - 07.17.10

In 2011, we went white water rafting, my first time, at Ohiopyle State park:

07.16.11 - Scary but exhilarating!

Youghiogheny River

After going rafting, I told myself that I should do something adventurous every July to celebrate and commemorate my mom's birthday and life. She died too young and it is a reminder that life is too short to not live life to the fullest.

So to continue the tradition, last year we were invited to a wedding to be held in mid-July in Michigan. It was for Roy's cousin's daughter and instead of flying out, we hit the road.  We watched the first full season of The Sopranos on the way up and back.

Sam & Aaron - 07.14.12

Luna Pier, MI - Lake Erie

Tigers vs. Angels - The Tigers went on to win the World Series!

This year, we don't have anything in particular planned but I am taking my first figure skating test on Thursday so I'm thinking that counts, right?  Four years ago, I would have never in a million years imagined that I would be doing loop jumps and camel spins and would be competing in an actual U.S. Figure Skating Sectionals event for synchronized skating. When I was 9, I dreamed of being a figure skater and I have the scar on my jaw to prove it (attempting triple axels in your living room is a bad idea)! So to celebrate my mom this year, I'm living out a dream and I'm going to skate and be the best skater I can be.

I wish she was here to be a part of my life but in a way she is more involved in it now than she has ever been before.

I love you, Ummah, and happy birthday!

UPDATE 07/18/13: I passed! More on the results in a separate post. Yay!

Final Gifts

This week has been an especially hard time for three of our friends - each of their mothers passed away. Here is something I found at HuffPost that resonates with my own experience of my mother's passing a few years ago. Sometimes it's difficult to understand the needs of a dying loved one:

How To Say Goodbye To A Loved One 

"First and most important: Meet the dying person where she is. She may be in denial, and denial is a fabulous crutch. You don't pull a crutch out from under somebody. Try to validate the feelings behind the denial. So imagine your aunt says, 'Let's reserve a house at the lake this summer. I loved the weeks we used to spend there.' You don't rush out to make a reservation; you reminisce with her about those good times. She's living in memories much kinder than her reality.

"But let's say she tells you, 'You know, I'm not going to live much longer.' The door's open. Be honest, direct. Tell her you hate that this is happening. Tell her it mattered that she was here. Tell her how she enriched your life, that she won't be forgotten. This is no time to pussyfoot. For God's sake, don't tell her she looks great, or that she'll pull through. Pretending creates a chasm of loneliness for the dying. Can you imagine if you were in labor, and no one in the room would acknowledge that you were giving birth?

"Toward the end, dying people tend to withdraw. You know how when you drop a pebble in a pond, the rings ripple out? For a dying person, the rings go in. It doesn't matter what's happening in politics or sports or the next room. Eventually all that matters is 'I'm hot. I'm cold. I love you. Do you love me?' At that point, all that's required is your presence. Be quiet. Put your hands on hers. That's it." 

-- Maggie Callanan, hospice nurse since 1981 and coauthor of the celebrated book Final Gifts

The End of the World Facebook

I did it!  I was contemplating leaving Facebook at the end of the year but I actually pulled the plug a little early and did it yesterday.  I feel liberated!  Liberated from all the ads, memes, posts on political issues, rants and gripes about everything, and flippant remarks.  Don't get me wrong, there was a lot of funny, interesting, and heartwarming posts and photos that I truly appreciated and will miss on Facebook but they were mixed in with all the crap and nonsense that overpowered the positive.  And after awhile, you start to feel like you've seen everything there is to see.  Why not just scale back, you ask?  "I have an addiction, sir!"

What also bothered me was that Facebook controlled mostly what I got to see and I wasn't seeing everyone's posts and not everyone could see mine unless it reached a certain level of popularity. It never used to be like this.  Plus, every other post is an ad.  I know, I'm complaining about a free service that I was using voluntarily, but things change and rather than filling my brain with the content spewed on Facebook, I am choosing to fill it with content chosen and filtered by me instead (what I have control of, anyway).  There's nothing I'd love more than to fill my time with classes but that, unfortunately, is NOT free.

I'm not saying Facebook is bad for everyone and not everyone behaves badly. It's how I'm perceiving it lately.  For me, as a visual person, what I read affects me more than what I hear and my perception thinking tends to go into overdrive.   Do I really want to judge or know a person solely by what they've contributed on Facebook? Not really. It's not natural.  But when someone becomes unlikable on Facebook, when you know you like them in real life, something is off-kilter. What's causing this? Maybe it's the posts that reveal inner thoughts and prejudices that most people wouldn't say out loud (at least not to everyone they know) or the ones that you don't necessarily want to read about - like about everyday stresses, politics, daily activities, how much you hate people who dot dot dot. There's are good things to read also, but when negative things are easier to see than the positive, it's time to change the view.

TEAM BLOGGER.  I'd oftentimes find myself asking, "how will people take this?" after publishing a post on Facebook. Am I being ignorant? Boastful? Polarizing? It's hard to convey tone without writing a paragraph or two and no one wants to read that much on Facebook.  I think this is why I prefer blogging because you tend to go deeper into what you are trying to express (as in topic + support) and you can edit as much as you want.  I need a buffer to minimize misinterpretation because there's been more than enough times in my life when my words have been taken the wrong way and I never got a chance to explain.  Also, instead of content being thrust upon the reader, the reader seeks you out (or stumbles upon you) and stays with you if what you are writing about resonates with them in a positive way. Team Blogger all the way!

But the number one reason I left Facebook is because my closest friends in (real) life use Facebook rarely, if at all, and isn't that the true purpose of using Facebook? To "help you connect and share with the people in your life?"  I do love me some Coach handbags but they are definitely not my peoples.

Grand Re-Opening Post

       Lately I've been feeling like I need to go back to blogging or find something to replace wasting spending my time on Facebook.   I really think it's making me emotionally and intellectually retarded or rather, a victim of groupthink.  Plus, there's been studies that show that Facebook users tend to spend more money (source) and that's something I seriously need to curb in the next year or two.

      So, my first tentative resolution for 2013 is get off Facebook for a year (or permanently?).   Think I can do it?  I have 20 days left to change my mind!